The Stretch Genie says it will stretch your shoes and gloves “magically” so that they will fit. Is it made with vaginal juices? …Cuz a vagina will stretch a mile before it will tear an inch.
Don’t know who Marcia Clark is?
I thought a “Crotch Gaffe” was something embarrassing, like queefing, or maybe even the reason you “depend” upon some protection against sneeze-generated urine. After all, gaffe means embarrassing. But no, a “crotch gaffe” is something a genetic male wears not only to hide his manhood, but to give his crotch a “natural look V”; a manufactured, faux, camel toe. If you’re a mature adult, you can see how it works here. (I’m no prude, but, speaking as a woman, uninvited, unexpected penis is so not welcome. …You are welcome for the warning and the option to see or not to see, as your individual case may be.)
By the way, if you think I am ignorant — well, I was. Now I’m educated. But then even folks looking for this sort of product may know less than the average ignorant person; check out the “Do not confuse with an artificial vagina” warning. Hey, I don’t need to be well-versed in crossdressing to know that a cosmetic shield won’t give you an additional orifice.
And another thing…
I honestly think calling such an appliance a “gaffe” is an actual gaffe. Why would you refer to the “correcting” appliance as the mistake or embarrassment?
Perhaps this is a simple spelling error… Perhaps they mean gaff, not gaffe.
Maybe you think I’m too rude, referring to a hidden male member as a “tricked exhibit”. But isn’t that more fitting?
The Crotch Gaffe is brought to you by Fantasy Forms Etc., Ltd., makers of breast forms for crossdressers — “Are they real? or are they Mam-Mor-X?” Which means their target market is those old enough to remember the “Is it live, or is it Memorex?” campaign, which began in 1972. Here’s a retro 80s reminder.